ATTENTION: This post may not be appropriate for all readers. It has references to the male organ.
This is some of my comedy act…if I had a comedy act and was a comedian ..this would be part of my comedy act.
I am amazed at how men like showing others and exposing their private part.
The first time I was exposed, literally, to this strange male event was when I was about 17 and traveling back and forth to Atlanta Georgia from Pittsburgh PA. I got off the interstate in West Virginia to get some gas for my VW Beetle late at night. There was a car pulled over near the entrance ramp and this man was standing, pants around his ankles, holding his…ahh..peepee, facing my direction. I was so shocked as I passed him. I had never seen a strangers peepee just being held out in the open in the flesh before. It made me laugh.
That same day I was in Atlanta, Smyrna to be exact, heading to a friends house to stay for a few days until I got me an apartment. On a small bridge before I got there a man was standing in the middle of the bridge. I went slow because I didn’t know what he was doing. He turned and he had his “best friend” in his hand walking right towards me! I was just as shocked as the first time. 2 peepees shown to me in such a manner within a 24 hour period. Should I have felt blessed? Did I have a “show me your peepee sticker” on my car?
The other two times in Atlanta Georgia. I was helping a French clothing designer show his designs at an opening of a bar. After the event we went back to his place. We were to be going to another showing but he wanted to stop off. He wanted to measure me for more clothes. I wouldn’t do it. He was drinking and I wouldn’t while he was drunk. He came at me with his buddy out! I was so shocked I started laughing at him. I went outside and he wouldn’t let me back in. I had to hitchhike (some nice person told me I was going the wrong direction), I had no idea how to get back to my car. But I made it. Another time it was 4AM and I had just finished work at a bar in Buckhead called Billy’s. A friend that owned a nice suit type bar took me there so we could shoot some pool. He started drinking tequila. Next thing he wanted me right there on the pool table so I left to my car. He came out with his “friend” in his hand begging me to come back. The sun was just starting to come up and this was right along Peach Tree St. It seemed he was trying to wash my windshield with his “squeegee” He was doing a very bad job and when he got far enough away from the car I drove away. I could see him fade into the morning fog still holding on to his friend for dear life. (cleaning the mess off the windshield the next afternoon was not that easy so if someone offers to use their bodily fluids to wash your window I would definitely decline the offer). Both of the men apologized to me later while I laughed remembering. I got to keep the outfit I was wearing of the designers too.
In Dominican Republic many years later, after I had moved there and had my little apartment in Ench. Julietta the peepee shows started again much to my surprise.
The first was a man I went to dinner with. We had been out a few different times but never kissed or even talked anything other than friends. He walked into my apartment to have a glass of water before he left. He was leaning against the wall. I turned with the glass of water and he was holding his “boy” in his hand looking at it like he was a proud father. I was so shocked and asked what he was doing with that. He asked if I liked it. I told him it was beautiful and burst out laughing. It was just too funny. He put it away and it was never discussed again and we are acquaintances still.
The next man I will call “Honey” I met him while I was on vacation over a year before I moved to DR and we knew each other a little. He rode me and Sniffy (my dog) home from a Colmado we had walked to. It was late afternoon. He was leaning against my sink in the kitchen when he grabbed my bottle of honey, opened his zipper, pulled his “wand” out and commenced pouring honey all over it. I calmly asked him what he was doing. He said I could lick it off. I laughed so hard that I started snorting. Yes, I snort when I laugh hard. His poor little piece of magic shrunk up in a second. I handed him a wash cloth to remove the honey. Guess he didn’t do a good job because for the next 10 minutes or so he was trying to make his escape, and I kept talking. He was pulling at his groin area. He finally said he was all sticky. I laughed during his walk down the sidewalk, him entering his car, and pretty much that whole night. I still laugh thinking of his face every time he tried to arrange himself because he was all sticky.
The next was with a group of friends. We had been drinking whisky. The guy was too skinny and it didn’t take him long to get too happy. He and I were in the back seat heading to our next destiny. We stopped and were getting out. He took my hand and set it on his…EEOOWW! flesh. I didn’t see it because it was dark and so was he. I pulled my hand away and told him that it was very nice and he should be really proud of it. Got out of the car and went and sat with the others. I told them what just happened. We all were laughing. It took him a while to get out of the car. Guess he had to wait for “the swelling to go down”. We laughed at him all night. He supposedly does not remember a thing.
One was a guy coming to repair my computer. After he was finished I asked him how much money I owed him. He told me it was OK. He didn’t want anything. He sat on my sofa and pulled out his “bill”. I guess he thought that was going to be his payment, me taking care of that for him. I laughed and called my dog over to take a look, even thought she was blind “Sniffy, mira eso. Â¡Toma!”. He zipped that thing up so fast he caught his flesh in the zipper. Poor guy. I gave him $100 pesos and let him out. He never looked back.
Another was a fine dressed, handsome, older gentleman. I met him dancing a few times and he took me home. He had to see me to the door as he had done before. I gave him a little kiss good bye and felt something “pop” out. His zipper was open and it did just pop out. He looked at it so lovingly, so passionately that I thought he was just going to take care of himself right there. He was for sure enamored by this hunk of flesh in his hand. I just smiled, thanked him for the night, pretended I saw nothing and closed the door.
I just do not understand the need to show peepees. What exactly is a woman supposed to do when a man shows his so-called manliness? Are we to get all excited and jump up and down clapping? Give it a kiss? Say “oh yes, that is an exquisite piece”? Give it a little pat on the head (LOL)? I just do not know what the reaction that is expected of a woman when one exposes himself in such a manor. Really, that piece of flesh is nice at the right moment. But not just hanging there like that. Out of context. And to place my honey on that, that is just wrong. What did he think, I was going to just be so happy that he wasted my good honey and made my floor all sticky. Did he really think I would lick it off for him? He didn’t even wash it first!
I have found that the laughing thing is the best way for me to handle it (or not to “handle it”). This way it lightens up the situation. Lets the situation become “deflated”. Act as if I saw nothing, which is usually the case.